“I am a stranger I meet often!”

I recently turned 24…and I still feel that I am a gift unraveled…A gift given 24 years ago..I am still trying to unpack the gift…I do not know the person inside me..

I am amused, shocked, delighted, bewildered..amazed at her..but if you ask me to describe what she is really like..I can only shrug my shoulders and look at the sky!

Now don’t get me wrong…I don’t suffer from any multiple-personality disorders…its just that I don’t really know the person I am..

I catch glimpses of me…see my reflection in things I love…but what I am …or who I am..or why I do the things I do..the way I do them…I have no clue!

The reason I am writing this is that there is a constant thirst…I cannot seem to ignore the urge to know more about this person who resides in me and still manages to evade me! Sometimes I meet myself amidst having a perfectly reasonable argument about what “simplicity” means…sometimes I meet me in the soft wind which causes the leaves to flutter…or sometimes a sad country song creates the perfect background music to meet myself.

This is all getting a little confusing so I will refer to the person I am trying to discover as another person.

Back to the discussion, her favorite haunts seem to be books ; old books..books of poetry..pages filled with someone else’s thoughts and hopes seem to reflect the real me!

Its been a constant hide n seek..and she is a difficult person to play against…All I know about her is that she loves colors..she loves words..and she loves the feel of water…she is moved by sunsets…and likes the sounds of silence…but she loves moonlight the best.

She looks at me indulgently when I work myself into a frenzy about silly things…and I can feel her disapproval when I indulge in self doubt or on the times when I give in to the urge to brag (which as most people know..is pretty often;) )

She loves to feel the texture of things…and has a simple understanding of things around and seems untouched by the emotional tempests which hold me in their fervor..At times such as those..she walks off refusing to talk to me into green pastures at the back of my mind.

We are friends in a way…her aloofness sometimes hurt me..and I wish she would stick around when I ought to make decisions. She sleeps gazing at a star filled sky while get bored stuck in a dreary conversation….and when we listen to a song she is transported into the realm of that song..while I stuck in this physical body feel left back..

She sometimes goes on a sail….or just lazes around…She never leaves my side as long as I am reading…and many a time..when I thought any article of mine was not good enough to exist in words…she has insisted on my not destroying them.

Sometimes she angers me with her laid back nature…her ability to say the other person is right than sticking to my side…and when she makes me repent and apologize. But overall I feel she is not the bad sort.

She is a nymph..who lives in the far reaches my mind…who visits me often…whom my friends see in a smile or a word..and many read in the nonsense I write!

Just now..she found out I am writing about her..she seemed curious…read the stuff I had to say..and smiled at me mysteriously.

Oh yeah,I am a stranger I meet often!